The Adventure of our Life

"For I know the plans I have for you..."

Thursday, September 16, 2010

A little more real

I had my 5th midwife appointment Tuesday afternoon. Although it was a quick and a pretty non-eventful appointment, it hit me like a ton of bricks. Why? We were given our Baptist Hospital packet. This includes information on birthing classes, our preadmission forms and a birth plan to help make sure what we want to happen during the labor and delivery actually happens. For some reason, just thinking about scheduling the tour of the Birthing Center makes it all the more real to me. I'm half way through the pregnancy and absolutely can't wait to hold this little girl.

I feel very blessed to (at this point) not have a million questions asked about the type of delivery I want to have or why we want to do clothe diapers. I think a lot of moms-to-be are driven crazy with those questions and opinions. Maybe the reason why I haven't had a ton of that going is, people know me well enough to know that, sure...they can give me their opinions, but I'm ultimately going to do what I want. That sounds sort of rude, that's not what I intend. For me, I am proud that I am a pretty decisive and sure woman that knows what she wants. I guess what I mean is that I'm glad that I don't give in to peer pressure. Does that make sense? I think so many young woman can be swayed one way or another if they are not sure of who they are.

Saying all that, I do appreciate all the mommy advice I'm given when I ask for it, and I definitely take in to consideration all the different options and opinions given to me.  I mean, it's not like I'm a pro at this yet.  I definitely don't know everything, and can't talk from experience yet. This is my first child!  I am so thankful that I have a number of really close girlfriends who have and are continuing to have babies. I feel like I can get up to date information from them and get really honest answers and advice from them. Thank God for those women and for my mom! Although she doesn't remember all the little things she dealt with during her pregnancy with me and Thomas, she's just supportive. Which is so nice and so needed!

The one thing I guess I would like is more support from the close people around me (the ones I need the support from the most!), on the choice to not do an epidural. My close friends know why I am choosing not to go that route and although they understand why I am doing a more natural birth, I don't feel like they think I can do it. That is disheartening. I guess because I deal with these migraines so bad, and they leave me in bed for days a lot of the time, maybe people think my pain tolerance isn't very high.  To me, it's just the opposite - although a very different type of pain, I know that if I can handle the migraines, I will be able to handle the birth. Nevertheless, I know that I am really the only person that has to believe in myself. And I do.

I am very excited about my support system that will be with me during the birth of Emery. My husband, Chris of course. He'll be my #1, my most important Encourager.  My mother, who will know exactly how to rub my head if I start getting a headache. One of my best friends, Brittany. She'll be my picture taker and positive reenforcement. And Tina, my massage therapist and close friend of my family. I'm viewing her sort of as my Doula. And she's someone to keep everyone else calm if they get too worked up. ;) 

Ah, so now, we do paperwork and schedule our tour and go to the Great Expectations Class. So scary, but so exciting!

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